Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es

@dgold Oh yeah, I'm not saying that people shouldn't attribute my toots, just making sure that people know that I have no expectation for them to do so

Huh, one of my toots is going around at the moment and people are actually adding an attribution at the bottom

That's really nice, completely unnecessary but really nice

For future reference I consider any toots I make to be public domain so there's no need for anyone to add attribution but that's lovely

@dragonluvr89 Major shareholders of health insurance companies

@noelle ...Nope, no they weren't, I refuse to believe people are that young LALALALA NOT LISTENING

@Elizafox "American", but I'm bad with locating American accents

Welcome, new people, to MASTODON!

Here's your complimentary fursuit, copy of the Communist Manifesto, pineapple, bag of oats, pair of jorts, and the rest of the memes that have popped up and I've forgotten about

Around here emoji are emojos, tweets are toots (unless they're called something else), retweets are boosts (likewise), and twitter is birdsite

Please feel free to visit the petting zoo, we have robosquirbuns, catfoxes, dragons, kobolds, sharks, and all manner of other creatures to pet

@kibi "The standard argument is that using "B" ... [is] a lazy substitute for a real joke"

...Isn't that what memes ARE?

@Elizafox Okay might exist, but Bielefeld definitely doesn't

@chr@cybre.space what do you mean "what if"?

You're right there

Due to being an octopus, I can offer 8 at a time!

@squirrel I think they're fine

@brassmerino newest Matt and Tom video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LeoklwonIMQ

@Elizafox I think everyone assumes that everyone else follows you already

@bea Oh yeah, those are like, totally tubular

I forget, was "tubular" an actual expression of something good or was it a piss-take, I can't tell them apart these days

Quote of the day: "Lettuce is just crunchy water" - Tom Scott

Tried explaining Mastodon to my sister the other day

"So what sort of people are on it?"

"Oh, all sorts, we've got a robosquirbun, a catfox, various sharks, dragons, and kobolds

Oh and some shapes as well"

"Keep taking the tablets, Sam"

@chr@cybre.space that would be excessively uncomfortable to listen to

If I'm ever in a Brewster's Millions situation I'm gonna hire all of you to shitpost full time