Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es

So, bitcoin reached 11k/coin recently

Then crashed by over 20%

The Bitcoin users are saying this is fine

Are they entirely fucking insane?

Thing I want but have no ability to make:

Console web browser with support for CSS, JavaScript, and images

Basically a modern web browser that doesn't need x running

Also it should support gopher

Y'know what? With current events being what they are I think it might be time to bring out some of the old classics

OOOOHHHHH Hitler, he only had one ball
Goering, had two but very small
Himmler, had something similar
And Goebbels had no balls at all

New! For winter! INSULATED JORTS

Everyone always talks about "military-grade encryption"

What they forget is that until the 90's British nuclear weapons were secured with a bike lock and for 20 years the US nuclear codes were 00000000

"military-grade" has nothing to do with quality, it has everything to do with being able to survive for five minutes in the hands of your average squaddie

Huh, apple staff are going to be busy for a little while

On High Sierra you can bypass the root password by... uh... leaving it blank and pressing login a few times

Fun fact: The Clangers, despite having all voices provided by a slide whistle, did actually have a script with full dialogue

LB: Soup Dragon was the best!

Well, I say new, new to me anyway

Asus eeepc 900 or something, turned up with xp installed, had to dig around for linux install media that still supports x86

Octopus has acquired a new laptop! (and terrible lighting)

Katie Hopkins has "left Mail Online by mutual consent" (read: been sacked)

Good, hopefully the sack of shit will now fade into obscurity

ATTENTION: Cyber Monday is now Cybre Bun Day

Please appreciate your local cybre bun

I am now full of chutneys, pickles, salami, and bread

@Elizafox Oh yeah, since you're Emperor now people'll be sending you petitions

Upside, you can issue edicts now!

Petition to @Elizafox Emperor of the US and Protector of Mexico

Whereas, the Web in its current state is barely usable on low-spec hardware, slow data connections, and low bandwidth caps

Understanding, that web developers seem unaware of the problem due to having good connections and high-end machines

Proposes, that all web developers are to have their Macbook Pros replaced by Raspberry Pi Zeroes and their WiFi with 56kbps modems until such time that they learn how to optimise their shit

Doesn't help that "masculinity" and "femininity" are such poorly-defined concepts

Humanity, if you're going to create a social construct it wouldn't kill you to document that shit properly for those of us who turned up late to the party

Okay, so, I generally reevaluate my starting assumptions every so often

One of the things I was double-checking this time around was "What gender are you"

My usual answer is "A bloke I guess, haven't thought about it", which isn't really an answer but more of a "dunno"

So, after research (which may have included googling "just what is this gender shit anyway") and a reasonable amount of introspection, looks like I may be classified closer to non-binary

So, uh, that may be a thing