Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es

Oh god, I reminded myself of this

http://nomoreteabags.com/

*angry british octopus grumblings*

@maple instant tea in a squirty can also exists and it offends me on every possible level

http://nomoreteabags.com/

@maple instant coffee runs a spectrum from "oh my god what is this?" to "really quite decent cup of coffee"

instant tea, however, is an abomination

A time traveller from the 2000's visits a modern software company

traveller: all your laptops have 32 GB of RAM in them?! Your devs must be doing some really heavy stuff, what the hell do they need all that memory for?

guide: web browsing.

traveller: ...you fukken wat mate?

the spam bots promoting gentlemen's clubs that turn up round here always seem to be promoting gentlemen's clubs in perth

why are they always in perth?

@maple *applies charging headpats to the bun*

@noelle @minego I am indeed and I shall continue to do so because the rest of the world is wrong

@noelle @minego a fighter jet can take off under its own power, the assistance isn't necessary to get it airborne it just gets it there faster

the wright flyer couldn't get airborne under its own power and so it shouldn't count

@noelle @minego my point is that if it can't take off under its own power then what you've got there isn't a plane, it's (at best) a glider

which people had been messing about with for a while

@noelle @minego bad analogy on my part, I went for the amusing visual rather than accuracy

but yeah, 20mph headwind needed to generate enough lift on the wings for the thing to get off the ground, in other words, couldn't take off on its own

@noelle @minego and therefore fulfil the "self-powered" part of the brief

for something to be a powered flight it has to be able to take off by itself, not just get blown into the sky like a badly assembled tent

@noelle @minego they needed to either slide down a hill to pick up speed, use a catapult, or have a massive headwind to take off!

I could bloody fly if you send me down a ramp or fling me from a catapult!

I'd probably get further than they did as well!

@minego more specifically, they didn't really get the first powered flight

pretty important part of the whole "flight" thing is taking off, which they couldn't do without a 20mph headwind which kinda invalidates the whole "powered flight" thing

who should really get credit for the first powered flight is a bloke called Alberto Santos-Dumont

@minego Wright brothers suck and their so-called "plane" was effectively just a kite with pretensions

mastodon: the only place I've ever found where you can shit-talk early 20th-century aviation enthusiasts and people know what the hell you're on about

@InspectorCaracal @maple okay, we can certainly agree on the fact that they built a thing which they said was a plane but was really a glorified kite

@maple good point, that was the chinese...

uh...

they invented the motorised kite!

sorta

I think other people may have put engines on kites before but they just didn't have enough headwind to take off

@maple hey, they didn't invent fuck all!

they came up with a plane that needed a 20 mile per hour headwind to take off

which is pretty much just a kite really but they did invent the kitey thing!

My thing for pilot's watches probably explains why I like the Cartier Santos so much, it's the original pilot's watch

First made by Louis Cartier for Alberto Santos-Dumont who piloted the first plane that could fly under its own power

(The Wright brothers can suck it)

@maple I'm octopus, not much changes