Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es

@squirrel heh, obviously my monitor is bad in the same way, 'cause it looks good on mine

SQL is pronounced "squirrel"

...

MySQL

@bob Can I pick option B?

@squirrel *good cuddly octo-pets*

@squirrel *pets the beepy maple*

@squirrel HEY I STOPPED MYSELF COMPLETING THAT SENTENCE

@squirrel You're like a TARDIS of gay

You're smol but gayer on the...

Nope, on second thoughts that sounds far too lewd

Apparently the Royal family have dropped another sprog

There's going to be fuck all else in the news for the next couple of days

@squirrel hai!

@uwunix@mastodon.technology "Yahoo just got bought out by a coven of lizard people"

@squirrel It's nlerf or nothin'

@Jo @squirrel @LaserScheme I'm always down for a new production by Masto Theatre

@noelle indices start at 0

@squirrel @LaserScheme *settles in to watch "Masto theatre with Maple and LaserScheme"*

Someone (I believe it was @vantablack) brought up Polari earlier

If you're not familiar with it, it sounds like this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8yEH8TZUsk

Got me thinking we should totally bring that back, or at least a similar cant

Can someone send a mechanic to Anthony Hopkins' place? I think he's broke

https://twitter.com/anthonyhopkins/status/988087131938742273?s=21

@squirrel that's certainly another way to do it!

@squirrel same

Also uses less electricity for the iron as it only has to heat up once!

@squirrel hi lesbun! I'm ... gayoctopus? goctopus? panoctopus? lesoctopus? loctopus?

Okay, none of those words work with "octopus", CURSE YOU ENGLISH LANGUAGE!