Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es

my mouth waters any time I hear someone mention meringue-based desserts

it's a pavlova-ian response

logos and slogans spray painted on ponchos

while usually the poncho would fold around you and conceal parts of the design you could reach your arms out to display it fully

yes, this is basically t-posing to assert your dominance but now you're also a flag

144

oh god damnit Ball Watch Co.

They've released a special edition of the Engineer III Marvelight

It's got a special dial with rainbow coloured tritium lume!

It's going to look gloriously homosexual!

$300 from each sale is going to covid-19 relief efforts!

The covid-19 relief bit is being handled by the salvation fucking army

You were so fucking close to greatness Ball, and you went and fucking ruined it

rfc for an ICMP BOOP control message for booping ur robot friends

probably best not to throw eggs, milk, and flour at a politician

you'd be done for assault and batter-y

I really want to hear the story of someone who responded to "reverse a linked list" with bogosort and how it ended up

Batman, holding a bat-razor and lathering up Mrs. Kent: thinking about it, I may have misheard superman...

who came up with the idea of adding salt to food anyway?

"we should put some of that rock on our dinner"

"you what mate?"

"mmm, tasty rock"

those past couple of toots I made were so bad they were literally freezing up my phone

if you put a G10 on a Vostok it's called a Warsaw Pact strap

I just saw someone refer to a badge wearing all the multicam and brandishing a shotgun as "duck dynasty cosplay" and I can't even

my mother: isn't weird when you eat mushrooms and your mouth goes all tingly

us: ...you what?

my mother: some mushrooms, they make your mouth go all tingly and pins and needles-y and really uncomfortable don't they? not all of them, just some of them

me: ...okay, so today we learned you're allergic to some mushrooms

Under UK law all sturgeon found in UK waters belong to the queen

Which is why the leader of the Scottish National Party avoids going swimming

putting cheese on a burger is like, the final insult to a cow