Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es

Toilet paper has been in use since at least the 6th century CE

Splinter-free toilet paper was invented in 1935

@Jo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YBxeDN4tbk

@Notlike21@nerdculture.de maybe they standardised on human souls as the equivalent of our standardisation on AA batteries

like, bigger and smaller souls are available and get used but the celestial TV remote takes human ones

@revolverocelot alternatively "kitty! good soul-stealing kitty! such a good kitty! here have some milk pls don't curse our cows"

all these entities that "steal souls" and all that

what do they do with them?

are human souls like supernatural pogs?

@mavica hug! good cuddly octohugs for the mavi!

Talk loudly about your recent holiday in Milan and cough a few times to get your own personal carriage on the tube!

@envgen get issued a driver's license a mile long as they try and fail to fit everything on there

@envgen put the entire dictionary in there

reply "xyz is my middle name" to everything

fun thing to give your D&D group: wand of dis guy's elf

summons a random elven acquaintance of the person you use it on

@evie I think you might have another cat

@mavica huh, did not know that

all I know about pwm is turning stuff on and off really quickly

@mavica do it super quick for PWM!

I'm not sure if that would be better or worse than having them full on all the time

@a_breakin_glass calling CWs royal subjects

"one has written a toot you may opt-in to reading"

@mavica *wraps you up in a cosy bunrito and gives you tea*

@cypnk alternatively issue little electromagnets on strings

swinging around a space station like spiderman

@mavica that would have been super cool to go to