Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es

there is no more british response to a terror attack than "eh, give us a bit, we've just started our lunch"

In Streatham police ask a cafe to close up and evacuate because of a terror incident

Waitress says "Give us 30 minutes, people have just started eating their lunch"

https://twitter.com/The_Write_Type/status/1224025845586702336

Nobody's actually found out how much the fish was yet

Scooter - How much is the fish?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cbB3iGRHtqA

@wigglytuffitout okay yeah we'll let 'em have that one

@mavica it's really weird how they go from "it's open source! it's infinitely configurable!" to "you're using it wrong!" in the same breath

@Nine

Bloke in quarantine for possible coronavirus has priorities in check

“The teacher said a nurse, who was wearing a face mask and not a full hazmat suit, brought him a sandwich and some custard cream biscuits. ‘I hadn’t had a custard cream in four years so that was a nice treat.’ “

@mavica I've never had creamed corn but I'm imagining a like, milk but slightly thicker consistency

@mavica OH! It's got actual milk in it! That makes a lot more sense!

I thought it was just corn juice with sugar or something, I retract my previous statements RE: corn milk

@mavica just how does one milk a corn anyway?

@mavica best computer

all beepy and good

sword gf

or;

baeblade