strippers Show more
Not content with taking over every other industry, robots are coming for the stripping jobs
Basically variations on this are why I shouldn't ever look at what's on aliexpress
If I had the money just about everyone I know would be receiving shipping containers of increasingly strange things
Me: Hello $bank, I'd like a loan of $largeSumOfMoney please
Bank: Why do you want the loan?
Me: I want to send a shipping container full of implausibly large squirrel plushies to a squirrel just to see the inevitably hilarious look on her face when it arrives
petition to call aquatic furries "fishies" instead
Hm... it's inflatable rather than a plushie but I'm sure it could be filled with polyfill
@squirrel, I think my mission is complete https://www.alibaba.com/product-detail/3M-Pvc-Giant-Inflatable-Squirrel-Outside_60551132976.html?
Yes, that's a 3 metre tall inflatable squirrel
LB: It's true!
Who runs the world? Squirrels!
And you may find yourself
Behind the controls of a large mech
And you may find yourself in a beautiful space suit
With a beautiful copilot
And you may ask yourself, well
How did I get here?
Damn, I've run out of my fancy nice deodorant
Unfortunately it's $expensive a stick so it might be a while until I get more in
Bloody "whatever's on offer in the supermarket" until then
pol, trump, nuclear annihilation (+) Show more
Hang on a sec, with that Trump tweet where he said he had a "bigger nuclear button than DPRK" I've had a sudden realisation
Nukes aren't fired like that. To order the nukes to be fired it's effectively just the President making a phone call. There's no big red button involved
So either Trump is speaking metaphorically (unlikely), or his aides have just gone to Staples, bought an "EASY" button and told him it fires the nukes
I feel slightly safer now
guitar shop guy: this amplifier is really kinda, mellow, glassy, but it's got a crunchy woody tone too
me: ah thats a shame. im looking more for somethin that sounds like........... a vibrating metal string.... except louder..........................
hey remember general mibi ??? what if your friend doesn't??? give the gift of mibi to all your friends and family and pets
racism Show more
Bloody hell H&M
I'm sure this wasn't intentional but you should have bloody noticed
Wired: Siblinghood of the Traveling Jorts
I could have gone for the world record for shortest ceremony
"Oi, you, you, yer 'itched, 'ave fun"
But nooooooo, apparently Discordianism isn't a "proper" religion