Sam the Octopus @troubleMoney@computerfairi.es
- Pronouns
- They/Them
- Species
- Octopus
- Status
- Wiggly
- Gender
- 418 I'm a teapot
Admin
Hedgehog wrangler, cat feeder, octopus whomst love smol critters
"i never thought someone could be such a watch nerd and yet here you are" ~ @maple
Joined Oct 2017
Sam the Octopus
boosted
"during orientation at a human college, vulcans are presented with a list of swear words.
“what is the word ‘fuck’ for,” the innocent young vulcans want to know. “surely there are more logical intensity modifiers.”
“yeah, you’d think so,” say the weary, jaded vulcan professors. “you’d really fucking think so.”
there is a phrase in vulcan for ‘the particular moment you understand what the word ‘fuck’ is for’."
Sam the Octopus
boosted
hey this is my mech, WE APOLOGISE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE
how would we explain chillies to aliens?
"so this plant, it's evolved to contain a poison that causes great pain so that mammals won't eat them"
"yep"
"and you're putting this in your food"
"yep"
*under breath*"dumbass humans"
Soon I shall hopefully be able to use the phrase "it's like riding a bike" without appending "I guess, I dunno"
I'm (a 28-year old goddamn adult) finally learning how to ride a bike
I've got going in a straight line about okay, corners however will need some work
Sam the Octopus
boosted
maple classic™ 
fake fact, promo
Did you know: Super John Stamos was an action adventure title made by Katsopotech Ltd. in 1988 for the NES. The game was cancelled shortly before completion due to a legal battle between the company and John Stamos. Only 2 prototypes are known to exist.
Here's the surviving soundtrack: http://bandcamp.mynameiser.in/album/super-john-stamos
I very much appreciate today's google doodle
It's an octopus with ice skates!
I wanna see the inevitable picture of Black Panther playing with a massive ball of yarn
Sam the Octopus
boosted
Like this toot if I'm valid
Boost this toot if YOU are valid
Sam the Octopus
boosted
Now That's What I Call Bepis 27
I should get a hovercraft
They look like fun
blub i'm an octopus
Can anyone explain why Jeff Bezos decided to build a clock that's designed to last 10,000 years?
If society collapses nobody's going to care what time it is and if it doesn't then nobody'll need to walk up a mountain to tell the time
Sam the Octopus
boosted
oh god, I just want Usenet back.
Booking my next holiday to this place https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lgDjX6xstCo
Sam the Octopus
boosted
tiny maplebot friend that can help me find out why the ps1 texture mapping is wobbly
Sam the Octopus
boosted
i'm a robot
- Pronouns
- They/Them
- Species
- Octopus
- Status
- Wiggly
- Gender
- 418 I'm a teapot
Admin
Hedgehog wrangler, cat feeder, octopus whomst love smol critters
"i never thought someone could be such a watch nerd and yet here you are" ~ @maple
Joined Oct 2017
